Overprogrammed

Just because I haven’t blogged since Poconos almost-half Ironman doesn’t mean I’ve been sitting on my tush gaining weight. Well, ok, I have been doing that, but only in addition to some other races.

It started off well. A week after Poconos I ran a 5k in which I got a 15-second personal record and third place in my age group. Then in November, I ran the Philly Marathon, a race in which I learned that it really sucks to run a full marathon when you did not train for a full marathon. First half = pure running joy; Second half = hoping poachers would declare open season on slow runners and put me out of my misery. In early December I ran the Hot Chocolate 15k at the National Harbor outside of DC. It was the most disastrously organized race I’ve ever done. The schwag was a nice cup of hot chocolate, some chocolate fondue, a cheap ill-fitting windbreaker and a truly nasty cold. Finally, just last week I ran the Disney Marathon. This was, by far, the most fun running event I’ve ever done, and I plan on going back for the Goofy challenge next year (half marathon on Saturday plus the full marathon on Sunday). I learned a word at Disney that will forever dramatically improve my running life: Biofreeze.

In any case, I’ve only been training a few hours a week since Poconos, and I’ve been eating as if I’m preparing for Ironman Kona. Besides eating, my time has been spent signing up for every single race I’ve ever heard of. My spring calendar (so far!) is absolutely ridiculous. It goes like this:

March 18: Shamrock ½ marathon
April 1: Cherry Blossom 10-miler
April 21: 5k for Clean Air
April 27: Out and Back Party Run (4 miles)
May 6: Broad Street Run 10-miler
May 26: Hammonton Sprint Triathlon
June 10: Eagleman Ironman 70.3 (wait list)
June 24: Philly Tri (olympic distance)

The only reason I don’t have my autumn schedule worked out yet is there are too many races on conflicting dates I want to sign up for.

By any standard, it’s too much. It’s too much time; it’s too much money; it’s too much injury risk. It’s nuts. As I was trying to work out my training schedule for this tangled mess, I had an epiphany. I’m self-medicating with races. I would rather blow my savings, my spare time and risk getting mangled than dwell on the very horrifying stressors in my life. Since there are worse methods to use to hide from life, I guess I’ll stick with my crazy race schedule, and even incorporate a bunch of over-the-top goals. For example:

1. I want my sub-2-hour half marathon this year, and I want it at Shamrock.
2. I want a sub-90-minute 10-miler (Cherry Blossom – this means you).
3. I want another PR in a 5k, preferably close to 25 minutes (it’s now at 25:45).
4. I really need to learn how to swim if I’m going to continue to be part of swimming competitions.
5. I have to stop being afraid of my bike.
6. I’ll stick with yoga and core work and weight training. Really, I mean it this time.
7. I want to lose enough weight so the people pictured in finish line race photos with me don’t have to hear “you weren’t any faster than THAT girl?!”

Insane? Absolutely. But not compared to what I'm already thinking about for 2013.